What I need,

Is to take a step back, and take a long look at myself.

I need to stop being Ashley Dale, the un-confident, selfish, in love with all fiction, all talk no action, type person, and become me, Ashley Morwenna Dale, the girl who says what she wants and gets it, type person. Sometimes I am that person but, most of the time I am not.

I need to stop hiding behind the persona that I have built up around me, unaware with what I was doing. To many of my friends, I am Ashley, the girl who loves Cornwall, is slightly mad, clumsy, and is constantly talking.

But I don't want that identity any more. I want to show the world that I can be motivated to become someone more than who I am, to be relaxed in my own skin.

So this year, its a tad late but I have decided that I will:

 1. Eat more carrots,

2. Give up my sin "Jealousy"

3. Not wallow in my own misery,

4. Paint, and be inspired,

5. Be a nude model so as to boost confidence,

6. Paint a nude model, (maybe this one first)

7. Become an official Buddhist by the end of the year,

8. To be at least able to do a bit of the Mumford and Sons song "The Cave" on my Banjo,

9. To not eat so much junk food at college,

10. To do at least 10 Abdominal Crunches at least twice a day,

11. To make a "Just in Case Tin"

12. Save money in the "Just in Case Tin"

13. To learn how to face read using the book Siang Mien,

14. To try and introduce guys that are my friends to my family,

15.To stop complaining that I have no clothes,

16. To stop worrying and take deep breaths,

17. To be spiritually at ease with myself, to except who I am and be done with it,

18. To get up earlier, despite my groanings,

19. Maybe try and publish a few poems,

20. Finally, to not dwell that I do not have a relationship, and realise, that its not all about wizard angst.

I have a future.

If I can do most of this by the end of the year, then I will definitely know that I can do anything.

I will post on my blog when any of this has been managed.